You think you know someone, and then you follow them on social media. Most of us probably think of Pop-Tarts as a wholesome family company, cranking out sweet, portable pockets of delicious baked goodness. That’s true, but in addition to all that, they’re also sick of our ridiculousness.
A Twitter user named @KieranCollins35 decide to @ Pop-Tarts with their kitchen experimentations involving one of their tasty tarts and a container of Old Bay seasoning. If you’ve never heard of it, it’s mostly used for flavoring seafood. Picture Pop-Tarts and crab juice together, and you’ll get a sense of this monstrosity:
That is offensive.
It’s unclear if the tweeter was trying to get a rise out of Pop-Tarts or if they genuinely think this is a good idea, but they definitely got their response. The social media manager for Pop Tarts has had a day, and they’re not taking anymore of this:
“I’m not sure why people need to take the time out of their ‘busy’ (jk) lives to ruin a Pop-Tart and try to get some attention but congratulations this is the most famous you’ll ever be.”
Wow, you better put some Old Bay on that burn and consider yourself seasoned, @KieranCollins35!
This has apparently been building to a head for some time, as Pop Tarts has been combatting internet debate about what, exactly, a Pop-Tart is. They’ll sure tell you what it is not:
Public service announcement:
1. Pop-Tarts are not ravioli
2. Pop-Tarts are not sandwiches
3. There will never be a Tide Pod flavored Pop-Tart
Have a nice day
— Pop-Tarts (@PopTartsUS) March 6, 2018
And they’re sick of everyone’s “innovative” Pop-Tart concepts:
Pop-Tarts have some specific ideas about what makes it tasty, and it will tell you when you crossed the line.
But some think coming for Old Bay is crossing a different line:
That person is definitely from Maryland. That’s one of the most Maryland breakfasts I’ve ever seen
— Miranda (@_mirandaflores_) June 27, 2018
Don’t screw with Old Bay. Marylanders take that shit personally and we’re a bit crazy. Our state sport is medieval combat and our flag is a collision between a fire engine and a school bus.
— Clark Oliver (@TK9582) June 28, 2018
Their angry tone is likely part of Pop-Tarts social media strategy, not just some deranged tweeter, and it certainly engages consumers. At least the ones who want to get dragged to hell:
But be careful, because this may turn into a brand war:
Eat Pop-Tarts in whatever disgusting way you want, but if you’d like an actual recommendation from the makers of this pastry (?), here it is:
I love a sweet Pop-Tart, but I love it even more when it gets salty.