Domino's Is Now Fixing Horrible Roads For The Best Reason

Domino’s pizza is basically a staple. 

Even if you aren’t a huge fan of pizza, you’re probably a fan of their prices and customer service. I mean, what other pizza chain would have a staff of people wrestle an armed robber to the ground and continue working their shifts like nothing happened?

Despite the fact that their food really isn’t all that delicious, I’ve always looked at the franchise favorably and I think a lot of that has  to do with the fact that they’ve never let me down with my orders and have always, always made it convenient as heck to order from them. 

Now when you combine going above and beyond to provide an excellent experience for your customers, with a wicked sense of humor, you end up getting a pizza spot that will literally do the work of the American government so people can get their pizza faster.

That’s right, Domino’s is fixing roads and paying for the labor right out of their own pocket.

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The pizza chain was sick and tired of seeing their pies getting damaged by poor road conditions. All the jostling around meant bad news for their boxed circles of hot yeast and cheese.

So they put cameras in their pie boxes to show what truly bad road conditions did to the pies. WARNING: seeing this image will be traumatic to pizza lovers everywhere.

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So they launched the “Paving for Pizza” initiative, which is a brilliant marketing strategy that actually makes a great point at showing how horribly inept some towns are at maintaining their local travel infrastructure.

By hiring local road crews and slapping their logo on the fixed potholes, they not only came up with a great way to promote their brand but join in on the gripe that a lot of us have, especially after every winter: Why are our roads so poorly maintained?

To date, Domino’s has already fixed a whopping 203 potholes. 150 in Athens, Georgia. 40 in Milford, Delaware, 8 in Bartonville, Texas, and 5 in Burbank, California.

People are asking the pizza maker to come to their town to take care of business, too.

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Crappy roads have been a problem nationwide for a very long time.

US News and Deutsche Bank ranked roads across the country and their findings confirm what we all know: states with highest population densities and more drivers have poorer quality roads.

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If you’ve ever visited the UAE you’d be hard-pressed to find a single pothole on the road. Relatively low labor costs, combined with smarter city planning and consistent weather with little rain or precipitation means that the country has less to worry about when it comes to maintenance.

So it could just be that America sucks at maintaining roads. I mean we’re so bad at it that Domino’s has to fix our potholes.

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Millennials Had The Best Responses To Article That Says They Should 'Just Work Longer'

Millennials Had The Best Responses To Article That Says They Should 'Just Work Longer'

Pretty much everything costs more now. I’m not just talking about inflation, I’m talking value.

Apparently, according to this Politico article, you’re expected to just work longer, instead of, you know, affecting laws to make sure that the top 1% doesn’t horde even more of the wealth that they already control.

The gut reaction many people had to the article was a simple one:

People weren’t buying the whole “suck it up” and “pull yourself up by your bootstraps” argument.

Probably because the bootstraps are exorbitantly overpriced and you need to finance a pair to own that incurs impossible interest rates designed to keep you in economic slavery forever.

Some people suspect a “baby boomer” wrote the article. You know, someone from a generation where working a single job (no side hustles required) was enough to purchase a home and have a spouse live at that home and take care of the kids.

The article had people responding with all sorts of dark jokes.

While others broke down what the writer’s argument was, in its essence.

But then there those who started serving up facts – and it’s that millennials, despite being ridiculously educated, knowledgeable, and skilled, are underpaid when compared to previous generations.

Never mind the fact that many basic tasks can be solved (and usually are) with computer automation. So you have people sitting around at jobs, who could be innovating, performing mindless tasks.

The fact that it’s “normal” for students to be tens, and in some instances, hundreds of thousands in dollars of debt for majors and professions that don’t pay (adjusted for inflation) as much as they did a generation ago, is absolutely insane.

It’s enough to make people feel all sorts of hopeless.

I mean I’ve come across my fair share of defeatist millennials who don’t hold themselves to the fire and hustle to go after their dreams. But for the ones who are, there’s no question that the economic ads are stacked against them today.

And we’re already seeing the effects of it now.

My own father is 65 years old and he’s hustling now just to hold on to a property that his family has owned for decades.

But that’s just the way things are now, I guess!

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This Grandpa Sent The Best Burn To His Granddaughter Over Text

Grandparents and technology are a volatile mix. Some take to it immediately, some don’t, and some are good at it because they’re so bad at it. Like Twitter user @amielmchugh’s Granda. That’s Scottish for grandpa.

She shared a text from her dear old grandfather that is simultaneously a guilt trip and a denial of her very existence:

Someone who seems to know the old fella chimed in with more classics:

If you couldn’t tell, that message was about compost:

Don’t try telling @amielmchugh this convo is a fake:

It seems like her gramps is pretty exhausting, so enjoying his occasional texts is a nice highlight in the turmoil:

People definitely recognize this situation, if not with grandparents, then in their own lives:

But seriously, don’t come for Amie:

Because she is just as savage as Granda.

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The Best Part Of The Olympics Is Leslie Jones Tweeting About Figure Skating

Back in 2016, Leslie Jones enlivened the Summer Olympics on Seoul with her live-tweeting and wild passion for Team USA. She was so good, she ended up getting invited to work as a commentary contributor for NBC.

She has been gearing up for the games in South Korea since January, which have just commenced:

No. Her current passion is fashion. 

Jones is watching men’s figure skating and rating their outfits. Some are not great:

But a few got the Jones seal of approval:

She especially liked the work of Christian Siriano, who famously designed a dress for Leslie Jones when she couldn’t find one for the premiere of Ghostbusters. They’re friends, but this is also a good outfit:

But she was impartial on other matters:

And if you’re tired of outfit talk, there’s also just her general fear of ever ice skating to be amused by:

This is the Olympics coverage we crave. 

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Best Buy Will Officially Stop Selling CDs And People Are Freaking Out

The last time I ever saw someone buying a CD was at Wal-Mart. While waiting in an unnecessarily long line to get a pint of midnight Ben & Jerry’s because I lost my self respect a long time ago, I saw someone in front of me with even less self respect.

In the overflowing shopping cart, on top of some And 1 neon green sandals and several microwavable dinners, were various country music CDs. I don’t remember all of the artists, but Toby Keith was front and center.

I was baffled: the last time I remember ever buying a CD was when I went to a Coconuts the day Sam’s Town from the Killers dropped. That huge disappointment was the end of the compact disc era, as far as I was concerned, and yet here this man was, in 2017, buying his music on a dead medium.

Even though I have a CD player in my beater Corolla, I used it only once, as a joke, when my best friend Chris Conroy found a Space Hog CD in his apartment that we listened to and summarily tossed from the car on a short road trip during this past summer. I’m sure the majority of people reading this aren’t jamming to tunes bumping from an old Sony Walkman, and yet still, store shelves and precious retail space is reserved for a bunch of compact discs no one will ever buy.

So it only makes sense that Best Buy has let music suppliers that it’ll no longer be carrying compact discs.

Apparently the news isn’t sitting well with some people, especially because they’re still going to carry Vinyl versions of albums.

The nostalgic, old-school appeal of Vinyl is understandable. Plus, when you have something on Vinyl, it looks like a piece of art you can hang in your home. But at the end of the day it’s all about business: Vinyl is coming back: the numbers don’t lie.

If people are freaking out about CDs going the way of the cassette, it’s probably because I, like other folks my age, probably feel old as hell.

I mean, I remember walking around the CD section, snooping track selections and trying to learn about new bands from the dude behind the counter.

Some people are arguing that CDs carry longer, live versions of tracks – ones that can’t be purchased on iTunes.

Others are just saying, “about time.”

Then the all-important juggalo demographic weighed in on the news.

Some people actually brought up some legitimate points about why this is a bad thing. But then again, you could always order them off Amazon. 

If you really want to listen to music on a CD, you could always burn them yourself and make yourself a sweet mix.

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This Rescue Dog And Baby Are Best Friends And We Can't Get Over It

Do you like friendships between babies and animals? Of course you do! You are a person with a heart. 

Well, here’s a good one for you. Nora is an English Pointer who was rescued seven years ago from an abusive situation by a woman named Elizabeth. Nora is still a little skittish but there is one thing she truly loves, Elizabeth’s youngest son Archie. 

The two of them are pretty much inseparable. When speaking with Bored Panda she said, “If Archie is having a bath, Nora is lying on the bath mat waiting for him to get out. If I’m nursing him she wants up on my lap, too.”

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Pro-Trump Student Tries To Get Classmate Expelled—And It Backfired In The Best Possible Way

We hold “Dreamers” to higher standards than most American citizens.

Regardless of how you feel about undocumented immigrants or the Deferred Action for Childhood Arrivals program (DACA), it takes a special kind of hate to cheer for the deportation of people who came to the U.S. as children and have known no other country. In exchange for protected status, DACA participants, or “Dreamers,” voluntarily identify themselves as undocumented, promise to commit no crimes, and actively contribute to society via scholarship, military service or entrepreneurship.

With President Trump threatening to rescind the protected status of 800,000 young Americans, a lot of people are terrified — for good reason. A Transylvania University student, Taylor Ragg, targeted fellow student and “Dreamer” Paola Garcia on social media. Ragg, the kind of Trump supporter who probably sleeps in his Chinese-made Make America Great Again hat, publicly harassed Paola, saying he was going to “send her back.”

Ragg posted this screenshot (since deleted) in a Facebook group called “10th Crusade Enthusiasts”:

A wave of harassment and threats followed. Garcia said she received messages like, “I can’t wait to get your f*****g c**t a** gone,” and, “You and your n****r boyfriend need to leave.” One person sent a picture of himself filling out a Homeland Security tip sheet.

In response, Garcia gave a voice and a face to the real human toll of newly-emboldened white nationalists:

Ragg has deleted his Facebook account, probably a wise move since he became a poster child for racist bullying once the story made national news. University officials were not happy with the harassment or the negative attention, and they allegedly expelled Ragg. Ironically, the school can’t legally share details of their actions due to privacy concerns. 

This brief message from the school will have to do:

Will other bullies, racists, and white nationalists get the message?

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These Photos From A Clergy Fashion Catalog Are The Best Thing On The Internet Today

I’m Catholic, so I must beg, Father, for you to please forgive me for what I am about to do—namely, show you stills from a clergy fashion catalog that bring all new meaning to the phrase “dad bods.”

British Twitter user Abi Bleach found these stills from the Wippell’s catalog, which has been outfitting clergymen since, literally, the 18th century (Europe is SO OLD, y’all).

And all I’ll say is that the blonde priest in these pictures is inspiring more than one deadly sin in me. 

Perhaps even more delightful than these pictures is the response from some actual clerics. 

A BREASTFEEDING CASSOCK. Plus, there is this crushable cleric selfie.

*Gives self the sign of the cross.*

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The Best Moment Of 'Game Of Thrones' Season 7 Is A Cat Meme Now

Look, you can keep your zombie dragons. For me, the coolest part of Game of Thrones season 7 was Lady Olenna’s deathbed speech in which she confesses to Jaime that she killed Joffrey, his son. 

The matriarch of House Tyrell, played by absolute legend Diana Rigg, was the coolest cucumber in Westeros and my favorite character in the entire series. So, of course, the internet has been paying its respects to the fallen Lady of Highgarden in the only way it knows: cat memes.

It’s a very simple meme, and yet it inspires delight in me every time I see it.

Maybe because cats always do look like they will poison your firstborn if you put stuff on their head.

But you might be wondering—does this meme work with dogs, too?

I am happy to report the answer is YES.

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Best Man Trolls Groom By Reading His PornHub Search History During Wedding Speech

Best Man Trolls Groom By Reading His PornHub Search History During Wedding Speech

When one sits down to write a best man or maid of honor speech, the task can be a little intimidating. 

These speeches tend to be an important part of the wedding reception, so the speakers want to make sure that they are heartfelt, and memorable. Usually the speeches tell embarrassing stories or fond memories of days gone by. 

Thom, the best man at Danny Hodgetts’s wedding, decided to take his speech to a whole new level. 

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In fact Thom partnered with porn site Pornhub, to create a hilarious trip down memory lane of his Pornhub experience. 

Watch the video below: 

The video starts with a message from Aria, a representative of Pornhub.

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She starts by reminiscing of days gone by. “We’ve been with you for years now,” she says. “Witnessing all your varying phases.” 

Here were two of her favorites: 

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“Danny, your stamina and loyalty is very much appreciated,” Aria says. She confesses that all of the girls are “gutted” to hear he is getting married. 

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She also goes on to prove his loyalty by saying that through his travels he has enjoyed their website “in the most countries worldwide.”

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Aria makes sure to ease his worry by saying that Pornhub has saved all of his personal favorites from their website. 

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Aria congratulates the bride and groom and lets them know that Pornhub has a gift for them as well. Pornhub knows his wife can’t travel everywhere with him, so they have offered him a premium membership whenever he travels. 

She responded to the groom’s tweet with a word of congratulations and a link to the original video:

As you might expect, Thom’s speech was a hit with the wedding party and guests. 

He told Refinery29:

“Everyone at the wedding loved it. My friend’s face as it was being introduced and played was priceless. They both saw it for what is was, very good-natured humour at his expense. You can see the reactions from the crowd in the video. Wonderful.”

Congrats to the show-stealing best man, Thom, for the most memorable speech the Internet has seen in awhile. 

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