Donald Trump Jr. Makes Offensive Tweet During Irma Emergency Announcement

Hurricane Harvey has devastated Houston. Hurricane Irma has flattened whole islands in the Caribbean, blasted the American territories of Puerto Rico and the Virgin Islands, and could be just the third Category Five hurricane in history to strike the American mainland.

Florida Governor Rick Scott is making it clear that evacuation orders are not to be ignored.

Important stuff, passionately delivered. Yes, the interpreter is a little distracting, possibly because the camera was closer to him than it was to the Governor. 

Here’s a reasonable dialogue about exactly that:

Is anyone surprised that Donald Trump Jr. tweeted something insensitive?

Junior got slammed in the rich guy equivalent of a junior high school locker and never came out. Here’s Hilary Duff’s 2004 hit ‘Haters’ (written about Lindsay Lohan, OBVS) for a quick study on just how disconnected Donny is from the present situation.

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Senator Tammy Duckworth Shares Selfie After Breaking Her Leg During A Workout

WARNING: The photo in this article may be AWESOME.

Usually a photo of a broken leg could be unsettling at best, and gruesome at worst. But Senator Tammy Duckworth from Illinois just proved that a broken leg can be hilarious. 

For those unfamiliar with Duckworth, she’s a former U.S. Army helicopter pilot who lost both legs in 2004 after a her helicopter was shot down over Iraq. She now wears prosthetic legs. 

Clearly a badass woman with a sense of humor, Duckworth tweeted:

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Joel Osteen’s Church Tried To Collect Money From Harvey Victims During Service

Pastor/founder/millionaire Joel Osteen caved to public pressure last week and opened his Lakewood Church to victims of Hurricane Harvey in Houston.

But Osteen is in hot water again after footage emerged of church ushers collecting donations from storm victims.

Dedicated to hurricane victims in the audience, the service includes Lisa Osteen Comes asking people affected by Harvey to stand up:

Many people in the audience do stand, and their fellow churchgoers pray for them:

Almost all experts agree that recovery from a disaster of this magnitude will be both slow and hard.

Comes tells worshipers that recovery from Harvey will not be slow or hard, but quick! And easy!

As soon as Comes finishes praying for the victims of the hurricane, ushers begin passing out collection plates so the people of Houston may donate to the church. Many of those people have lost their homes to the record floodwaters, while Osteen’s net worth is estimated at $ 40–70 million. 

Watch the whole video:

Joel Osteen’s eye is always on the bottom line: how much money can we make and what do we have to say to make it?

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Best Man Trolls Groom By Reading His PornHub Search History During Wedding Speech

Best Man Trolls Groom By Reading His PornHub Search History During Wedding Speech

When one sits down to write a best man or maid of honor speech, the task can be a little intimidating. 

These speeches tend to be an important part of the wedding reception, so the speakers want to make sure that they are heartfelt, and memorable. Usually the speeches tell embarrassing stories or fond memories of days gone by. 

Thom, the best man at Danny Hodgetts’s wedding, decided to take his speech to a whole new level. 

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In fact Thom partnered with porn site Pornhub, to create a hilarious trip down memory lane of his Pornhub experience. 

Watch the video below: 

The video starts with a message from Aria, a representative of Pornhub.

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She starts by reminiscing of days gone by. “We’ve been with you for years now,” she says. “Witnessing all your varying phases.” 

Here were two of her favorites: 

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“Danny, your stamina and loyalty is very much appreciated,” Aria says. She confesses that all of the girls are “gutted” to hear he is getting married. 

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She also goes on to prove his loyalty by saying that through his travels he has enjoyed their website “in the most countries worldwide.”

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Aria makes sure to ease his worry by saying that Pornhub has saved all of his personal favorites from their website. 

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Aria congratulates the bride and groom and lets them know that Pornhub has a gift for them as well. Pornhub knows his wife can’t travel everywhere with him, so they have offered him a premium membership whenever he travels. 

She responded to the groom’s tweet with a word of congratulations and a link to the original video:

As you might expect, Thom’s speech was a hit with the wedding party and guests. 

He told Refinery29:

“Everyone at the wedding loved it. My friend’s face as it was being introduced and played was priceless. They both saw it for what is was, very good-natured humour at his expense. You can see the reactions from the crowd in the video. Wonderful.”

Congrats to the show-stealing best man, Thom, for the most memorable speech the Internet has seen in awhile. 

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Pornhub Took A Huge Traffic Hit During The 'Game Of Thrones' Premiere

Game of Thrones took over the airwaves on Sunday, and also destroyed everyone’s timelines with jokes and complaints about Ed Sheeran. Yes, the long anticipated season 7 premiere was finally here and you know what that means: time to take a brief break from masturbating.

The Independent reports that popular pornography site Pornhub shared their statistics from the hour on Sunday night that HBO was airing GoT. They found that during that time period, traffic to Pornhub dipped by 4.5 percent, saying that shows a “considerable change in visitors as Sunday night is one of the most popular times for people to visit Pornhub.”

I know what you’re thinking. That’s not such a huge dip. But when you actually look at the graph, it’s pretty hilarious:

The question is, are people so in love with Game of Thrones that they’re willing to stop pleasuring themselves for an hour to enjoy it, or are they just finding their pleasure…elsewhere?

When season 6 premiered, Pornhub says they had a drop as well, but only by 4.1 percent. People have gotten even more excited for this show than ever before, perhaps even too excited in ways we don’t want to contemplate. But the site says their biggest dip ever was during the finale of season 6, when they experienced a 5.2 percent traffic dip. People always get worked up when you leave them wanting more.

Pornhub seems more amused by the loss of customers than angry, as does everybody else.

And it’s not the first time someone has made the connection that they’re more or less the same thing:

We’ll see whether porn or Jon Snow can keep our attention longer this season.

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Jon Stewart Roasts Jimmy Kimmel During His Own Monologue

Pennsylvania teen Will Rubin held a Jimmy Kimmel-themed Bar Mitzvah, and Kimmel decided to talk to him on air about it—which was really, really cute. To everyone, that is, except actually Jewish talk show host Jon Stewart.

“You probably had your choice of idolizing any talk show host and you could’ve gone with a Jew, that’s all I’m saying,” Stewart said. “Will, don’t be fooled by his learned-looking beard and his sad, puffy eyes. He’s not rabbinical; he’s just unhealthy.”

“Wouldn’t you rather idolize a talk show host that is also circumcised?” he asked. “I don’t know how to put this. How do the kids say it? He’s still wearing his hoodie.”

Give him a break, Jon—the last time you were on air, he was still a boy. Now he’s a man. 

Though it seems like many adults were just happy to see Stewart back on TV.

We can only hope that the next time he’s on late night, he’s there permanently.

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Student Trapped On Train During His Graduation Ceremony Gets Surprise Celebration

Former high school student Jerich Marco Alcantara missed his commencement ceremony at Hunter College’s Brookdale campus on Tuesday, after getting caught in a delay on the E train. Alcantara toldSelect All that he had opted out of the second ceremony at Radio City Music Hall later in the day, because that one had a two ticket limitation for family, and he wanted as many people as possible to be there. 

In fact, many of his friends and family members were traveling with him to the earlier ceremony when they finally admitted they weren’t going to make it. 

“I was on track to be at my commencement at 9:15 a.m., but the delays altogether ended up taking almost three hours,” Alcantara said. “After 45 minutes, I knew I was already late, but I kept hoping that I’d at least make it to walking the stage.” 

Most kids would throw down their clapboard hat and sulk at this point, but Alcantara rallied and ended up giving everyone on the train with him a very memorable experience:

Train goer Naduya Afzal posted a video on Tuesday of Alcantara in his full graduation regalia, getting a makeshift “diploma” from a friend on their cell-phone while the most high school song of all plays over a loudspeaker: “Good Riddance (Time of Your Life)” by Green Day. 

It’s an oddly touching private ceremony witnessed by two dozen fascinated strangers, that ends with Alcantara hugging and kissing the people traveling with them. Presumably they’re not just more strangers, but who knows.

He even offers onlookers a copy of his diploma, saying, “If you want a copy of my diploma, turn on your AirDrop.” It seems like a few people took him up on it, if hesitant questions about how to turn AirDrop on are any indication.

If you’re thinking of doing something similar, be warned that magical New York City moments like this can’t be planned. “It wasn’t so much an idea, but something that just happened,” said Alcantara.

“Everyone was getting antsy and impatient, so I figured I’d lighten the mood by thanking everyone for coming out. That led to applause, and the rest just followed.” 

Eventually, the family did make it above ground, but they were too late. The real ceremony had ended. Though this kid has bad luck with public transportation, he has good luck with friends.

“So I missed the commencement, but after the auditorium cleared out, my close friends threw me my own little graduation,” Alcantara said. 

Another one? “It was a great time,”  he added. 

It’s disappointing to miss a big life touchstone like graduation, but at least Alcantara hit a different milestone early on: going viral. Congrats!

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Adele Scolds Security During Her Own Concert, Making Fans Love Her Even More

When you’re at a concert and you’re really into the music, sitting down isn’t really an option. Adele understands this fully.

And although security has a job to do, like making sure fans don’t mob the stage and disrupt the performance, telling people to sit down who are clearly digging the show isn’t cool. Which is why Adele went off on the guards, urging fans to stand up by telling security to stop making them stay in their seats.

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Bride Hilariously Surprises Groom During Their 'First Look' With T-Rex Costume

To say that marriage is an emotional experience would be a colossal understatement. You’re basically devoting the rest of your life to another person in the hopes of building an incredible life with them. 

It’s a huge step and one that’s usually celebrated with an epic party. And when you’re planning for your wedding celebration, you have to make sure everything is perfect. People go on crash diets and get all dolled up. When figuring out the ins and outs of the wedding, couples usually learn a lot about each other, specifically how they react to stressful situations.

Sometimes it can be a bit much, so letting out some steam becomes necessary.

Like this bride did when she trolled her groom-to-be by wearing a T-Rex costume for his “first look” at the bride.

“First Looks” usually happen when the couples get all glammed up for each other in their wedding regalia and then take photos to memorialize the beautiful moment when these two people realized the other has never looked so hot in their entire lives.

Jon Clark Weddings and Paul Seiler Photography captured the moment and talked about being accosted with the bride’s amazing idea:

“He told me the bride was thinking of doing a first look… in a T-rex costume. I knew we had to encourage this thought, and so, we did exactly that. This couple was so fun as you can tell, and it definitely was a dream wedding to shoot,” videographer Jon Murray said in an interview with Fstoppers.

First looks are usually a lot less hilarious and more sappy, in case you were wondering.

Basically me whenever I get home and see the dude at Taco Bell put in an extra crunchwrap supreme without charging me.

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Woman Hurls N-Word, Spits At Black Couple During Chicago's Margarita Festival

Ernest and Cassie Crim, a husband and wife team that are also high school teachers, were looking forward to Chicago’s Margarita Festival being held at the end of July for months.  Unfortunately, a day that was supposed to kickoff the big wind-down to their summer took a very ugly turn.

The black couple were next in line for a game of cornhole,


Exhibit A

After hurling a string of racial epithets at the couple, Ernest Crims pulled out his cell phone to being recording the confrontation and almost immediately had the phone slapped out of his hands by the woman, who would later be identified as Jessica Lynn Sanders.

Before the video ends, the woman spits at the Crims, managing to hit Mrs. Crim on the arm.  Festival security removed the woman from the event, and Chicago police confirmed that the Crims have filed a simple battery charge against her.

The video was uploaded to YouTube, showing the gross level of offense the Crims were subject to for simply being there 

Cassie Crims was understandably upset

“I was humiliated after that.  We had a lot to think about. We’re educators. We’re black. We had too much going for ourselves to stoop to that level.”

They believe that the recent racial tensions that have come to light nationwide were a contributing factor.  In Chicago alone, racial hate crimes have gone from 13% to 24%, almost doubling between 2010 and 2014.

Ernest Crim, who uploaded the video, had this to say

“I feel like the history and the climate of this country had already nurtured the [anti-black] mentality that she had.

In this day and age, I just wanted to get her on camera so I can expose how ignorant she is and was.”

 

(h/t mic)

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