The Internet is full of trolls, but some very special people get away from their computers and go out to their communities to troll their neighbors in real life, the way people did before technology took over. Artist and comedian Alan Wagner is just such a genius, and though his images do eventually find their way onto his Instagram account, they’re meant to baffle casual strollers who encounter them out in the world.
Wagner seems to use a mix of found images and visuals he creates with Photoshop. His graphic design skills range from hand-written scrawls to old-school typography that makes his signs and advertisements look like they were ripped out of a psychopath’s textbook published in 1986. In other words, they’re perfect.
Take, for example, this extremely creepy ad for blood removal that specifies the service will deal with no other bodily fluids:
How about discovering your destiny through your kneecap?
He also files missing person’s reports. In this case, he’s found someone’s missing person.
Here’s a sign helping the elderly become even older:
Here’s a normal dog and trombone exchange. Oh wait, it’s the “trobmone,” actually:
Some of these ads are a pretty big commitment, like this one on the side of a bus stop:
But they’re all useful. Who doesn’t need a car impersonator to enliven a party?
Maybe you’ve always wanted to meet a woman who breathes dust, if just to convince her to stop:
Some are a bit NSFW:
Or tell a really compelling two-part story:
Stories of lost love and wasted food product:
And family dramas:
There’s also attempts at product-testing on the cheap:
And some run-of-the-mill health issues:
Even though they’re all jokes, Wagner really has thought of something for everyone. He will tap into your deepest nightmares and make them very, very funny.
Mother’s milk for good Internet boys and girls.