This Guy's Pre-Workout Amazon Review Lists All The Hilarious Side Effects He Felt

This Guy’s Pre-Workout Amazon Review Lists All The Hilarious Side Effects He Felt

One of the best (and worst) parts about the internet is that so much stuff is just plain made up.

Now you might be asking yourself, “How can that ever be considered positive?” And it’s true, there is a ton of fake news out there causing all sorts of havoc, so much in fact, that some people feel it helped get a former reality TV star elected President.

But, I would counter your fake news woes with the wonderful world of exaggerated Amazon product reviews that are almost always hilarious. I mean, just look at these amazing words of praise for the iconic three-wolf moon shirt.

That’s right, he called it “career development fertilizer.”

You can buy pretty much anything on Amazon and find out whether it’s good or not thanks to the retailer’s handy-dandy comments section. Coincidentally, people who actually take the time to read product reviews are prime targets for some lighthearted trolling/gifts of hilarity. Like the reviews that have been pouring in for this pre-workout powder.

Now if you’re unfamiliar with the world of fitness supplements, there’s one thing you need to know: it’s a lawless wasteland.

Because of that, it’s home to some of the craziest, “bro-science” claims you’ll ever hear. As a result, there are some MOs that lots of these supplements follow. And if you used to read Muscular Development and all the crazy bodybuilding magazines back in the day, you’ll know exactly what I’m talking about.

The LIT pre-workout powder’s product description falls in line with the supplement lingo.

  • Clinically Dosed Pre-Workout
  • Built By Science. Driven By Obsession. Elevated Through Innovation.
  • If It’s On Our Labels, Then It’s In Our Bottles. Get Lit And Train With Focus, Power And Pumps.
  • Proven Ingredients. Proven Doses. Clinical Quality. Real Science. Real Results.
  • Summary:

Which may or may not have inspired people to write such hilarious testaments to the efficacy for this “pump” powder. Like Amazon user Dino2925’s review of the stuff.

Here it is, in full:

Walked into the break room at work for a glass of ice water. Noticed a container of this sitting on the shelf. Thought it might flavor my plain water reasonably well so I mixed some up. Blue Raspberry. I read the label as I stirred. “May cause flushing and tingling”. I smirked, thinking that wouldn’t be an issue. Background: 5’11”, 270 lbs. A walking wall that spends an inordinate amount of time lifting large weights. I don’t use supplements but am peripherally aware of their function. This is labeled as a pre-workout supplement. I figured that since I was going to the gym later, it couldn’t hurt.

The taste was delicious. Sour and refreshing. Within a couple minutes, my face went numb. I laughed, thinking maybe there was something to that warning label. Soon, the tingling spread to my arms, legs and chest. Then the itching started. The whole body itching that someone might experience after swimming in a lake of toxic waste. The label didn’t mention the itching. Then the caffeine kicked in. I think that the manufacturer forgot to mention that one of the secret ingredients was methamphetamine. Proprietary blend, with a sprinkle of cocaine. I literally couldn’t blink. Had I been surrounded by a group of angry police officers, I suspect the ensuing viral video would have been epic. One review mentioned that this product is ‘Fire’. That phrase went though my mind prior to reading it.

It took about two hours for the product to wear off. The itching was unnerving. Ten hours later and my tongue still hurts. I never did get to the gym. This product would likely be awesome during the first hour of a Zombie Apocalypse, as your situational awareness will be off the charts. You’ll feel as strong as a gorilla and the itching will keep you moving. I don’t know if sweating would help mitigate the itching but I suspect not.

When I get back into work on Monday, that container will still be sitting there. Calling me. Tempting me. Part of my brain will shout “Remember the itching!”. Another part will whisper “Remember the rush….” I’ll probably opt for a glass of water and think about zombies.  

The invigorating, itchy affair didn’t seem solely reserved for Dino, either. Other people testified to the fortifying effects of the powder.

Others think the pre-workout is so good that Jesus himself would use it.

Lots of the reviews comment on the fact that the product leaves you feeling “tingly,” but everyone pretty much unanimously agrees that it works.

Not sure I want to be itching/tingling all day just to have a slightly better workout, but I have to be honest, I do kind of want to try it now. Sorry Dino, your trauma has done little to dissuade me from wanting this product.

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Joana’s Horde Guide Review – Read This Before Buying a WoW Guide

World of Warcraft guides are easy to come by. There are hundreds of differnt guides available for WoW players; however, not all of them are equal. Some are free, some are cheap, and others cost a bit of money. It can be hard for the average player to pick out a great one. If you’re looking for a good guide, then you must first do a bit of research and read reviews written by other players.

During your research, you’ll probably come across a lot of information about Joana s Horde Leveling Guide. This is what most players consider to be the #1 guide on the net. The first guide was for Horde players who wanted to take their characters to level 60. However, since the release of Wrath of the Lich King game, the guide has been updated with 61-80 information. There is also a Death Knight walkthrough available.

There’s no doubt that this is one of the best WoW guides. It’s no mere e-book that contains the same information as many others on the net. No, this guide has it all: videos, add-ons, interactive features, and more. There are over 35 hours of video footage that show all the secrets of leveling Horde characters. Whether you have a Blood Elf, Undead, Orc, Tauren, or Troll, these videos and manuals will take you from level 1 to 80 in no time at all! Every starter area is thoroughly covered.

One reason why your leveling will go so quickly is because all of your quests will be linked to Allakhazam and Thotbot. You can easily learn where to go and how to get there without having to look for solutions and leaving your game running in the background. You will be shown the shortest distance between any two locations, as well as all the flight paths. You’ll also be guided to all the flight paths without getting lost.

All in all, Joana’s Horde Guide is something that will benefit any WoW player, whether you’ve just started today or a year ago. You’ll never have to worry about getting lost or running out of gold ever again, as these tools, videos, and resources will help you beocme the Elite player you’ve always wanted to be!

Do you want to earn 5,000+ WoW gold in just one week? Do you want to level up your character from 1 – 80 within ten days? You can do so easily by getting yourself Joana’s Horde Guide! No matter what race and class your character is, you can become an elite player and dominate over others with a Top WoW Guide

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