People Can't Stop Laughing At How Ridiculous Their Pets Look When They're Sleeping

One of the things I admire most about my cats is their ability to sleep anywhere—on the bed, behind the toilet, draped over the shoe I’ve been looking for for the last twenty minutes. They just have the capacity for bone deep relaxation. And sometimes it looks really, really weird.

A popular Japanese hashtag that loosely translates to “be an untidy sleeper” is circulating on Twitter right now, and it shows just how freaky animals get when they’re chasing that REM sleep:

These animals are all supposedly okay. They’re just ridiculous, not in comas. But if you saw a person looking like this on the couch, you’d scream:

This rabbit food was set to stun (I checked, the rabbit on this person’s timeline is FINE):

Animals don’t care where they land:

Or if they’re scaring the crap out of you:

Or what corner of the cage they’re crammed into:

But, again, they’re okay!!

Even if it seems like they’re trying NOT to be okay:

And then, in the snap of your fingers, they’re ready to play again.

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This Couple Proposed To One Another At The Exact Same Time Because They're Meant To Be

It can be hard to stay positive on Valentine’s Day when you’re single, but every once in awhile a real gem surfaces in all these sappy love stories clogging up social media. This is one that will make you shout from the rooftops, “Love is real!”

Meet Tori Monaco and her girlfriend Berkley Cad—or I should say fiancée. They just became engaged after asking each one planned a surprise proposal for the other, to take place at the exact same time.

Insiderreports that they had some help—Cade’s mom knew what each woman was planning, and helped facilitate their proposals so that they took place during a family Pictionary game.

“Her mom was the mastermind,” said Monaco. “They were planning this perfect proposal.”

And she caught the whole thing on video:

In the video, Cade is at the easel, trying to lure the love of her life into guessing, “Marry me.” But then she turns around and sees Monaco on bended knee, asking the same question. Cade had been planning the proposal with her mother for some time, when mom got a call form her daughter’s girlfriend sharing her plans to do the exact same thing. Of course, mom got to scheming.

Everyone is sobbing over this perfect moment:

Help, I’m sobbing! This is the first same-sex relationship for either woman—they met online and traveled across state lines to meet each other. They hit it off right away and have taken it all the way to a ring. And they’re celebrating:

I think this expresses it pretty well:

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People Are Sharing Their Worst Landlord Stories And They're Truly Horrific

Speaking of home loans: you’re probably gonna need a hefty one if you don’t have some help from your parents or make a crap ton of money. Home prices are at some of the highest they’ve ever been, and that doesn’t even factor in the ever-increasing property taxes, ie money you continually pay just to have the privilege of owning your home. So even if you own it you don’t really own it.

Then there are all the headaches of owning a home, maintaining a property, footing the bill for all repairs, insurance, higher heating and energy costs, it can all seem not worth the headache. So renting seems like an alluring option. That is, until you get a crappy landlord. And boy, there are plenty of those, as evidenced in this Twitter thread.

Some of these stories might get you house-hunting ASAP.

If you’ve ever had problems with your apartment: heating, hot water, you know how annoying it can be to contact a landlord to get it fixed. But this guy’s building owner’s “ingenuity” takes the cake.

While others were just plain criminal.

This is just wrong on so many levels.

This guy sounds like a real boogey man.

This nickel and dime scumbaggery.

If square footage was mentioned in a signed lease, then this guy could’ve sued for all the rent he paid.

But sometimes, landlord experiences pan out just fine.

On Reddit, there are plenty of awful renting stories, too.

There was the old die-and-switch.

And showing off the place while people were still living in it. Classy.

So if there’s anything you can take away from this post: know your tenant’s rights and always, always get signed copies of the lease with clear language. Just because you get a nightmare landlord doesn’t mean you have to settle for it.

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Disney's CEO Just Told Fans What They Can Expect From 'Deadpool 2'—And They're Ecstatic

One of the biggest reasons the original Deadpool film was such a huge success and earned Fox such a ginormous box office return was because Ryan Reynolds worked his butt off to ensure it was as Deadpool-ey of a movie as possible.

That meant violence. It meant gore. It meant sex and inappropriate jokes and a lot of breaking the fourth wall. 

Now that kind of thing might seem like a movie producer’s worst nightmare. Major motion picture studios looking for the highest rate of return are allured by family-friendly, safe cinematic choices. The more mundane and mediocre and inoffensive a film is, the more guaranteed of a return of investment, statistically speaking.

I mean, there’s a reason why a film about a bunch of murderous bad guys ended up being rated PG-13 and watered down to a “meh” mess. A “meh” mess that nabbed nearly $ 750 million at the box office.

Deadpool was a huge departure from that boring, MPAA-rating-friendly studio process and it ended up reaping the benefits. Fox greenlit a sequel almost immediately after the film’s opening box-office numbers came in, and things were looking great.

But Disney’s CEO, Bob Iger, assures fan that Disney’s got no problem with being in the R-rated film business, just as long as “audiences know what’s coming.”

Which means that the upcoming film won’t receive a whole bunch of edits and cuts for the sake of assuring the film isn’t “too edgy.”

Ryan Reynolds took the news of Disney’s buyout in typical Deadpool fashion.

And Twitter was ecstatic that their favorite foul mouthed red bodysuit wearing unkillable smart-cracking ninja won’t be censored.

But people don’t want the love to stop at Deadpool 2, they’re worried that Iger’s just talking about the film as if it’s a one time thing.

While others aren’t exactly holding out hope for the future.

It could make sense for Disney to keep some particular superhero films rated R. Movies like Logan and Deadpool could get their own treatment or exist in an “alternate timeline,” where the more family friendly films aren’t tied to their risque counterparts.

But seriously, the Deadpool movies need to stay rated R so when the Spiderman crossover films come out, this happens.

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Astronauts Just Tweeted Photos Of California Wildfires From Space–And They're Unsettling

It’s hard to miss the news that huge swathes of Los Angeles and Ventura counties in California are currently on fire. Extreme winds have been blowing smoke and ash across residential areas, and hundreds of thousands of people have been evacuated. Footage of people driving down the 405 as the hills burn around them look like the freaking apocalypse. 

If there is a group of people you’d guess are unaware of the natural disaster consuming the West Coast, it’d probably be astronauts. They’ve either got their eyes on the stars, or they’re floating around in space, so far from Earth and all her troubles. 

Actually, it turns out they have a pretty unique perspective on what’s going on down here, because their cameras capture everything:

Astronauts and space stations all over the world are capturing images from the sky of how California looks right now, and it’s freaking scary. The streams of smoke are covering almost the entire city and more. The pictures will make you wonder how anyone is managing to survive down there:

Someone even tried to label all the neighborhoods, to give people a more specific idea of who was under all that ash and smoke:

Who knew this place looked even more frightening from far away.

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This Guy Planted Fake Halloween Costumes In Stores And They're Hilarious

The comedian was back at it again this past Halloween with some funny costume ideas that he left in stores to prank shoppers who were none the wiser.

Some of them take jabs at ridiculous news trends, like Millennials being responsible for the death of certain industries.

Others were just straight-up ridiculous. Haven’t you ever wanted to go trick-or-treating as a pair of jean shorts?

Along with non-descript, clearly plagiarized character costumes doing their best to avoid copyright issues.

There’s also the oh-so-wrong Absent Father.

And the inexplicable: Milkshake Duck.

What ducks have to do with milkshakes, I have no idea.

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This Teen Stopped Her Friend From Committing Suicide And Today They're Married

Someone on Quora asked, “What is one moment in your life you thought could only happen in a movie?” and one of the answers, by Kevin Walsh, was especially astonishing and romantic. “I can’t not answer this,” he wrote.

“Once upon a time I was 13 at a summer camp and the prettiest girl I’d ever seen walked right up to me and said ‘black is a good color on you.’ No idea why,” he wrote. “We chatted and became friends, exchanged AIM screen names (it was the time) and stayed in touch for a while.”

“We fell off each others’ radar some time in high school, but I can promise you that not a day went by that I didn’t think about that girl. Even now I’m not sure I can say why – something about her just stayed with me.”

“In my senior year I went through some dumb high school stuff that seemed earth-shattering at the time, and fell hard into depression,” he continued. “I resolved to take my own life, wrote a note and went to where I planned to end things.”

“Somewhere between 5 and 10 seconds before I would have committed suicide, my phone rang. I checked the caller ID – I couldn’t die not knowing. It was a number I didn’t recognize, so I picked up and it was her.”

“I asked her what was up and she said she just felt like she had to call me. At that point it had been a year since we had spoken, and at that moment she just had to call. Long story short, she pried, I spilled the beans and she talked me out of it. I mean she literally said ‘What? Don’t do that’ And that was that.”

“She made me promise to call her the next day, and we hung up. That night I started writing the words which, ten years later, I’d propose with,” he said.

Walsh told Buzzfeed that talking to someone about his suicidal thoughts helped him. “There is power in saying it out loud. There’s a good chance that the moment it comes out of your mouth you’ll realize it isn’t what you want at all,” said Walsh. 

If you, or someone you know, need someone to talk to, you can call the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline at 1-800-273-8255.

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The Obamas Have Been Spotted On Vacation And They're Looking Chill AF

After eight years of running the free world, the Obama family was definitely in need of a vacation. And after spending a long weekend in Palm Springs, the former first couple have now been spotted on the British Virgin Islands. 

Barack and Michelle were spotted by one Twitter user as they escorted to the holiday home of billionaire Richard Branson by police and secret service agents.

And always one for style, Barack cheerfully said hello to those who had come to see him and replied “thank you so much” after someone wished him a happy holiday. 

Talking of style, he also has his hat backward and Twitter can’t handle it.

The Obamas are believed to be on one of Branson’s private islands, he owns two — Necker and Moskito. He was likely on the island when he issued a statement condemning President Donald Trump’s executive order that bans travel from seven Muslim countries and blocks refugee applications for three months.

“President Obama is heartened by the level of engagement taking place in communities across the country,” the statement read. “In his final official speech as President, he spoke about the important role of citizen and how all Americans have a responsibility to be the guardians of our democracy — not just during an election but every day.”

“Citizens exercising their Constitutional right to assemble, organize, and have their voices heard by their elected officials is exactly what we expect to see when American values are at stake.”

“With regard to comparisons to President Obama’s foreign policy decisions, as we’ve heard before, the President fundamentally disagrees with the notion of discriminating against individuals because of their faith or religion.”

Relax, president. You earned it. 

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Nearly Half Your Coworkers Masturbate While On The Job And They're More Productive

There’s nothing wrong with masturbation. It’s a healthy way of relieving built up sexual tension that results in zero STDs, births, or awkward goodbyes. Obviously, like anything it can become an addiction, but it’s perfectly normal in healthy amounts.

However, when and where you masturbate is probably as important that you masturbate and recent studies show that people aren’t really picking the best locations for their stroke sessions.

Because it turns out that almost 40% of people masturbate while they’re on the clock.

In a survey conducted by Time Out New York, 39 percent of office workers outright admitted to getting their self-freak on while at work.

Here’s the thing though, it isn’t just men who did the deed, but women conceded the fact that they masturbated on the job as well.

One anonymous female who took part in the survey said that it helps to relieve her when she’s feeling “hungover”.

And although it might seem kinda gross, it turns out that beating your meat or playing the clam xylophone on company time could have a lot of benefits according to experts.

University of Michigan researchers discovered that regular masturbation results in lowered cortisol by boosting endorphins and hormones.

The study also found that women who occasionally partook in pleasing themselves possessed a higher level of self-confidence than women who didn’t.

He says employees should use it as a healthy motivational tool for completing one’s daily tasks.

Maybe don’t use the bathroom that’s on the same floor as his office if you’re ever at that school.

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The FBI Made A Hilariously Bad Holiday Greetings Card And They're Getting Roasted

It’s the time of year that you start to hear “happy holidays” from friends, family, and businesses whose mailing lists you accidentally signed up to five years ago. The Federal Bureau of Investigation, which gets billions in taxpayer dollars to protect us, is no exception. Except this year they didn’t really seem to put much effort into it. In fact, it looks like an intern spent all of five minutes on it. And that’s being generous.

In fact, it looks like an intern spent all of five minutes on it. And that’s being generous. Here’s how they wished their followers on Twitter happy holidays…

LOOK AT THAT WORK OF ART. Unsurprisingly, they’re getting roasted pretty hard for it by Twitter users. 

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