This HIV-Infected Man Is Paid $7 To Have Sex With School Children

In remote areas of Malawi, it’s traditional for girls to be made to have sex with a paid sex worker known as a “hyena” as soon as they reach puberty. Village elders believe the act is a form of “ritual cleansing,” but the BBC recently interviewed one “hyena” who is HIV positive and has had sex with hundreds of girls.

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Eric Aniva, who is in his 40s, is a sex worker in the Nsanje district of southern Malawi. He was described as “enthusiastic for media attention,” and he told the BBC:

“Most of those I have slept with are girls, school-going girls.”

“Some girls are just 12 or 13 years old, but I prefer them older. All these girls find pleasure in having me as their hyena. They actually are proud and tell other people that this man is a real man, he knows how to please a woman.”

But girls in a nearby local village told a different story:

“There was nothing else I could have done. I had to do it for the sake of my parents,” one girl told the BBC. “If I’d refused, my family members could be attacked with diseases – even death – so I was scared.”

Locals consider the “cleansing” necessary in order to “avoid infection with their parents or the rest of the community.” Sex with the hyena must never be protected with the use of condoms. They believe that a hyena’s good morals will protect their daughters from being infected. 

In actuality, it’s led to Malawi having one of the highest rates of HIV in the world, with more than 1 million living with the disease.

While officials know the rituals need changing, they stop short of condemning it. Dr May Shaba, permanent secretary of the Ministry of Gender and Welfare, said:

‘We are not going to condemn these people. But we are going to give them information that they need to change their rituals.’

One of Aniva’s two wives, Fanny, told the BBC that she does not want the ritual to happen to her daughter: 

“I don’t want that to happen,” she says. “I want this tradition to end. We are forced to sleep with the hyenas. It’s not out of our choice and that I think is so sad for us as women.”

“You hated it when it happened to you?” the interviewer asked.

“I still hate it right up until now.”

“Not my daughter. I cannot allow this. Now I am fighting for the end of this malpractice.”

“So, you’re fighting against it, but you are still doing it yourself?” asked the BBC. 

“No, as I said, I’m stopping now.”

“Really?”

“For sure. For real, I’m stopping.”

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Celine Dion's Rihanna Impression Is The Greatest Thing To Happen This Week

While we thought our shameless love for Celine Dion couldn’t grow any more, she proves how flawless she truly is. Sure, she’s sustained a successful music career for over thirty years. But she also handled a tragic year with the utmost grace. She lost her husband of twenty-one years, René Angélil, and her brother, Daniel, just two days later.

Despite all the hardship, she’s continued to work enthusiastically and received the Billboard Icon Award at this year’s Billboard Music Awards. 

Simply put, the woman is legendary.

Her appearance of Jimmy Fallon last night was nothing short of incredible. The two played an epic game of “Wheel Of Musical Impressions.”

Because who doesn’t want to hear celebrities impersonate one another singing childhood songs? Previously, Celine herself was imitated by Ariana Grande on the show. 

At First, Celine seemed pretty nervous about the game, but, of course, she dominated and it’s entertaining AF. She channeled her inner Cher, Sia, and Michael Jackson. But her ultimate performance was a rendition of “Row, Row, Row You Boat” as Rihanna. Spoiler alert: it’s to the tune of “Work” and it’s awkward and entrancing.

Here’s a little sneak peak of Celine getting pretty into it. 

…Those moves. Even Jimmy was concerned. 

You can watch the hilarious clip below. 

The Rihanna magic begins at 2:36. You’re welcome. 

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This Koala Broke Into A Woman's Home And Tried To Pole Dance

Thanks to all those seasons of Law and Order: SVU, pretty much everyone is terrified of finding an intruder in their home. Unless, of course, the assailant is cute and furry. Nikki Erickson, an educator and competitive pole dancer from Australia, came face- to-face with a pretty cute trespasser in her home a little over a year ago— but she just released a throwback video of the incident. And the Internet cannot get enough. 

The video that Erickson uploaded to Facebook features a sneaky Koala who broke into her house…and tried its hand at pole dancing. 

The unexpected visitor actually showed up at a good time. Erickson returned from a long day at work was ready to “dance the shitty day away” when she bumped into the cute little intruder. Apparently, the koala was a well-behaved house guest: it “sat there while [I] talked to her and took photos and did not growl once,” she wrote on Facebook.

Naturally, the video has been shared 2,000 times. 

Now, we don’t mean to make generalizations about the species as a whole, but it seems that koalas probably aren’t natural pole dancers.

“She wasn’t so impressed with my shiny slippery chrome tree,” Erickson wrote. But the performance certainly made her day.

Unfortunately, the koala couldn’t stay forever. 

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According to the Huffington Post, the little goofball was rescued by Queensland’s Daisy Hill Conservation Park and named Larissa. “They made sure she was okay and in good condition, then released her,” Erickson said. Larissa even made the Conservation Park’s staff Christmas card. Because it’s hard to top a pole dancing koala. 

“I will never forget this day,” Erickson wrote. 

We understand. It’s hard to forget your first koala pole dance performance. (h/t mashable)

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This Grumpy Old Man Is Everyone Who Doesn't Understand Pokemon Go

When something wonderful enters our lives, there’s always someone who hates it no mater what. Take Pokémon Go for example. Pretty much everyone in the world is playing it and saving animals in the process

But one guy is sick and tired of people hunting for Pikachu in his yard. Reddit user Poopanddoodle recently posted a photo of a sign he spotted while using the app.

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Here’s the full text:

This is a PRIVATE yard, for Tenants of this building only, NOT for Pokemon chasing.

GET A LIFE AND STAY OUT OF MY YARD.

This Whole Pokemon Hunt Is by far the Stupidest Thing I have ever Seen, and I have lived through:

– Hammer Pants;
– Crystal Pepsi;
– Trickle-Down Economics;
– the First-Past-The-Post Electoral System;
– People Taking Jean Chretien Seriously;
– the Macarena;
– the “Will-Ennium”,
– the Presidency of George W. Bush; and
– ten Seasons of CSI: Miami.

There is a Bar up the street and around the Corner. Go there, Have a Beer, and seriously think about your life choices.

This guy doesn’t like Jean Chretien OR Pokémon Go?! What a hater. Twitter user Joe Heenan decided to give his rebuttal to this grumpy old man…

His note reads:

This is a private garden.

But if you see a Pokemon in here, come and get it.

ENJOY LIFE.

This whole Pokemon hunt is by far one of the best things I have ever seen. 

Don’t let:

Bitter killjoys

People with no imagination

Folk that hate fun

Members of the conservative party [the United Kingdom’s ruling political party]

Angry dads

Donald Trump

Tell you otherwise.

This is awesome!

Now go and catch as many fucking Pokemon as you can.

And people seemed to love his response.

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18 Absurd Headlines That Should Not Have Happened This Week

The truth isn’t always stranger than fiction, but in these cases, it totally is.

1. Tinder date lands Darlington man in Turkey amid military coup

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The only question his friends have: “Did you get laid?”

2. Punch in buttocks ‘ruined’ man’s life, court hears

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Was the puncher Mike Tyson?

3. Men fall from cliff playing Pokémon Go

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Becoming a Pokemon Master is dangerous work.

4. Thief on the ‘runs’ after stealing rum mixed with laxative

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What a sh*tty cocktail.

5. Aston Martin recalls cars for door locks that work too well

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I hate when my Aston Martin is just too perfect.

6. New Zealand Man Quits Job To Become Full-Time Pokémon Hunter

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I feel like we’re going to be seeing this happen a lot in the near future.

7. Turkish President blames military coup on man living in Pennsylvania

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Listen President Erdogan, just because you had one bad trip to Lancaster county, doesn’t mean that the Amish are out to get you.

8. Pa. man accused of illegally owning human brain, using embalming fluid to get high

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How would one go about owning a brain legally?

9. New Environment Secretary backs fox hunting, selling off forests, and opposes climate change measures

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What was their campaign slogan? “F*ck the environment”?

10. Wisconsin couple wakes to find strange man sleeping in their bed

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“Aww come on, everyone loves a little three dog night.”

11. Minnesota man charged with selling salt as meth; previously sentenced for screwdriver stabbing

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Well at least he didn’t sell real meth.

12. Mud runners sick after National Water Sports Centre event

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Yeah because crawling through a bunch of dirty water for hours is such a great idea.

13. Sex offender arrested, accused of playing Pokémon Go with kids

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Children, if a grown-up asks if you want to see their Charizard, run the other way.

14. Crossword artwork filled in by German woman in museum

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I think deep down inside the original artist is smiling.

15. Australian man admits to amateur testicle surgery

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NO.

16. Donald Trump: Sarah Palin won’t speak at RNC because Alaska is too far away

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Also because she’s kind of an idiot.

17. Potato leads to arson charge against Connecticut stripper

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Please tell me there’s a potato-themed stripper out there named Spuds.

18. Sheriff challenges road rage woman to knit her way out of prison

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A woman at the wrong place at the wrong time. A ruthless sheriff. Two knitting needles: “KNIT OFF” in theaters this Christmas.

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This Incredibly Motivated Homeless Student Biked Six Hours And Camped Outside His School

Police in Barnesville, Georgia rushed over to Gordon State College after receiving a complaint of a tent pitched outside the school. They told the tent’s occupant to exit the tent with his hands in sight. So Fred Barley, a homeless student, emerged.

The nineteen year old biked six hours to the college town so he could job hunt before the dorms opened in August. 

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The biology major, who had just enrolled in his second semester, brought only his tent, some water, a box of cereal, and a few personal belongings… Talk about dedication to getting an education, despite impossible circumstances. 

The officers, taking “protect and serve” seriously, brought Barley to a motel and paid for a two-night stay. 

“I could tell he was a good kid … who had been dealt a bad hand,” officer Dicky Carreker tells the Barnesville Herald-Gazette. Carreker’s wife was so moved by Barley’s story that she posted it on a community Facebook page. 

Once her Facebook post began circulating, locals decided to get involved to make sure Barley could have a successful year in school. 

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Casey Blaney, the owner of the motel where he was staying paid for his room through Monday, when he’ll be allowed to move into the dorms early. Barley also got a job at a local pizza place and received a variety of donations from locals including school supplies, clothes, and a new bike.

Once Barley’s story started making national news, impressed people everywhere got involved to help the dedicated student. Blaney started a ‘Success For Fred’ GoFundMe page  which shattered the $ 30,000 goal, reaching over $ 51,000 in only two days. 

Barley has since recorded this thank you video for all his supporters. 

“I can’t begin to come up with half the words to explain how much I feel,” the aspiring doctor said. “I’m in total shock.” He also promised to save the money as best he could and even offered to keep his supporters updated on his performance in school. 

So, there is some hope left for humanity, after all. Yes, there are people causing traffic accidents over Pokémon Go, and tragedy / political violence seems rampant, but there are also incredibly determined students and people with the good sense to help them out. (h/t wsb-tv)

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This Bleeding Shark Teabag Is The Kitchen Item You Never Knew You Needed

If you happen to be a tea drinker with a predilection for gore, or if you just like owning gross items that will make your houseguests uncomfortable, your dream kitchen item has arrived. Daisho Fishery Company, a Japanese seafood export company, created a line of disturbing tea bags in the shapes of sharks…. Teabags that will simulate a shark attack when dropped in water. What’s not to love?

Sure, these teabags look innocent enough…

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They’re the perfect additions to a little aquatic-themed tea party! Customers will have a choice of two different sharks and flavors: the great white shark, filled with rose hip and hibiscus, or the whale shark which is filled with green tea. 

They even come with little tags in the shapes of divers and boats!

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Perhaps they drag the tags with them into the water to make things more realistic.

But then you drop them in hot water, and tea gushes out… And it looks gory AF.

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Black Lively certainly made shark attacks look good in The Shallows, so how bad could they be?

And we ask you: who doesn’t want to drink a messy shark attack?

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Daisho is currently crowdfunding for the project on Makuake so they can mass produce the bleeding sharks. They’re hoping to raise one million yen (around $ 9500) in three months. And, weirdly enough, they’re well on their way to their goal.

In case you needed a more compelling visual, check out the video of the teabags at work. 

(h/t mentalfloss)

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A Photographer Defended This New Mom After Body Shamers Trashed Her Intimate Postpartum Photoshoot

One of the many joys of being a woman in our society is the inability to please and ever-present and critical audience looking to dissect women’s behavior, life choices, and appearance. Oftentimes, it seems like there’s no escaping the sting of public opinion.

Unfortunately, a recent “controversy” surrounding a Canadian photographer’s photoshoot with two new parents perfectly illustrates just how much women are held to impossible and conflicting standards. 

Photographer Trina Cary shot a series of breathtakingly gorgeous photos of Mel and Gabby— a couple who recently welcomed THREE children. 

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Carey was seeking models for a shoot in which she hoped to “showcase self-love, couples love, postpartum and body confidence all in one go.” Mel and Gabby, she told BuzzFeed were the perfect fit. 

Mel, who is clearly a superhero, gave birth to three children in only twelve months. That’s right— she became pregnant with twin girls when her son was only three months old. These little miracles of nature, however, did take a toll on her self esteem. As she wrote in a blog post, it was “hard to adapt and fall in love” with her postpartum body. 

“Every mom knows that it was worth the struggle for the end result,” she wrote. “But it’s still hard. You don’t have time to think of the way you look most days, but sometimes you catch a glimpse of your body and hardly even recognize the reflection staring back.”

But Mel decided to do the shoot “to let go and celebrate the journey [her] body had been through.”

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“Not once did Gabby ever make me feel insecure about the way I looked,” she said. “He still thought I looked as beautiful as the day he met me. It was time for me to feel the same about myself and set an example for my girls.”

The love and positivity clearly shows in the photos— which are totally giving us #RelationshipGoals. 

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Cary shared the stunning photos on her blog with a clear message in mind: “Women, let us celebrate our flaws. Own our stretch marks and extra skin.”

It didn’t take long for the photos to go viral. 

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The photographer has shared photos on her blog before, but Mel and Gabby’s shoot really caught the Internet’s attention. The photos were shared widely, and Cary was inundated with positive feedback over the beautiful photos. 

But “the Internet” still includes body shamers and trolls who will never be satisfied.  

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Cary told BuzzFeed she was shocked and upset by some of the responses.

As far too many women know, there is no pleasing the body shamers. In their minds, everyone is too fat or too skinny to deserve love or recognition— in Mel’s case, she was too skinny. Commenters said she was “too skinny” to be insecure about her body. Then the modesty police intervened, calling her a “slut” and a “hot” for sharing the photos. 

…You’d think the trolls could at least come up with some more creative language for the insults. But we digress. 

“People are cruel,” Cary told BuzzFeed. “I shouldn’t have been surprised as I deal with haters all the time regarding vulnerable sessions but I was in shock… The fact that people jumped at tearing her apart broke my heart. Insecurities are personal; you can’t tell someone how to feel.”

Sadly, Mel was so bothered by all the hate that she declined to speak to any media about the shoot. 

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Cary said the comments bothered Mel so much that she has declined speaking to the media about the photos.

“She read some of the negative comments and they really took a toll on her,” Cary said. “Words hurt.”

Cary had finally had enough of all the negativity, so she took to Facebook to defend the couple. 

She felt compelled to point out the inherent sexism of criticizing solely Mel for the photos, and voiced her sadness over the hurtful delivery of opinion. 

I hurt for Mel. I hurt for any other woman trying to regain her confidence and do something for herself. The gist of the comments were people who aren’t comfortable with their own bodies lashing out at her – funny it was always her never her husband. Everyone is entitled to their own view and opinion but there are many other constructive ways to voice that without being rude and hateful. This session was not about two people being vain this was about learning to love yourself again. There isn’t one person out there who doesn’t want a nice picture of themselves that makes them feel good when they look at it. Some people even went as far as calling her a slut or a hoe, shame on you!!! This woman has dedicated her life to her husband and her children. She is fighting personal insecurities and your best comment is to trash her?! It makes me physically sick reading comments like these. Words hurt, people! I feel sorry for the authors of these comments because they are the ones who need a session like this most but will never have the courage or strength to do one. They are the ones shrouded in jealousy and insecurities and choose to reply out of spite.

Ultimately, Cary said, she wrote the post because she wanted people to “see the love” behind the shoot. 

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… And we think she succeeded. (h/t buzzfeed)

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Can You Beat Snoop Dogg In This Marijuana Quiz?

Everyone knows that the s to the n to the double-o-p is pretty much the authority when it comes down to anything cannabis-based and it’s because the guy’s a self-proclaimed, loud and proud pot-ophile. I’m pretty sure that if he was stopped with an ounce of weed on him, the cop would just take a selfie and post to Facebook about how much of an honor it was to meet Snoop.

So to try and go toe-to-toe with Snoop in rolling a blunt or smoking a certain amount of weed would be insane.

But how about a weed quiz? It seems like a foregone conclusion you wouldn’t know as much about weed as the d-o-double-g himself, so trying to beat him in this weed quiz may seem like a pointless endeavor. Unless you manage to beat him, then you’ll definitely earn his respect and approval. And if you’re anything like me then that will mean the world to you.

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19 Absurd Headlines That Should Have Not Happened This Week

The truth isn’t always stranger than fiction, but in these cases, it totally is.

1. Andrea Leadsom says she’ll bring back fox hunting to improve animal welfare

1
independent

Did…did anyone tell her that’s not how it works?

2. New York City gives $ 78 million worth of tax breaks to dead people

1
news.com.au

But the living are screwed.

3. Delta Plane Mistakenly Lands at South Dakota Air Force Base

1
abc

Hopefully the pilot didn’t say, “uh oh” over the intercom.

4. Council staff had to watch hundreds of hours of explicit CCTV for lap dancing club case, court hears

1
leicestermercury

“Darn honey, I have to work late again.”

5. Vegans go on the offensive over advert starring Lee Lin Chin, a bowl of kale and a flame thrower

1
dailymail

Vegans, getting pissed off about something? What else is new?

6. Fired Fort Lauderdale cop brings black girlfriend to hearing to prove he’s not racist

1
nbc

“See! I’m screwing one of these people!” Is what he probably said.

7. St. Louis-area woman on ISIS hit-list told to “arm up”

1
kmov

The only thing worse than Jehovah’s witnesses knocking on your door to give you this information is an FBI agent telling you this.

8. Teenager’s love of hummus leads to near fatal shooting in Cincinnati

1

Ground chickpeas are serious business.

9. Microsoft invites ‘bae’ interns to ‘get lit’ on ‘lots of dranks,’ then apologizes — again

1
seattle times

So. Much. Cringe.

10. Police: Using cane to operate car, paraplegic leads Portsmouth police on high-speed chase

2013 Ford Mustang
alcatraz

When there’s a will…

11. South Carolina town bans saggy pants, $ 600 fine for repeat offenders

1
foxla

This is what we’ve come to.

12. ‘Kerry snail’ blamed for 45-minute traffic jams – Healy Rae

1
independent

I knew it. I freaking knew that all of the traffic can be traced back to one person.

13. Seagull drone poops sunscreen…uh, thanks

1
cnet

Such a wonderfully gross idea.

14. Man injured after bullets thrown into Canada Day bonfire

1
cbc

The bullets later apologized.

15. St. Petersburg homeowner discovers soda-stealing burglar petting the family dog

1
abc

This criminal’s all right.

16. Buc-ee’s Demands $ 67K Back From Ex-Employee Because She Left

1
houstonpress

Can she make a countersuit claim on the basis of their stupidity?

17. Treating alcoholics – with wine

1
bbc

This will end well.

18. Would-be Colorado Springs carjacker foiled by total inability to drive stick

1
gawker

“He just…totally sucks at driving cars.” – What I would say if I was the cop giving a press conference on this sad, sad event.

19. Indigenous woman yells ‘I hate white people’ before punching white woman, but it’s not a hate crime judge rules

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Come on, this sh*t goes both ways.

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