Twitter Comedian Uses President Trump's Own Words Against Him–And It's Not Good

Hurricane Maria has devastated Puerto Rico, but President Trump didn’t bother to mention the storm for five days. Puerto Ricans are standing in line for food, water, and gas, and 95% of the island remains without electricity. On Friday, San Juan mayor Carmen Yulín Cruz unleashed a withering, emotional plea for immediate help.

Cruz said, “We are dying. What we are going to see is something close to a genocide.”

Not surprisingly, President Trump took the mayor’s desperate cry for help as personal criticism, because this administration has no concept of compassion, empathy, or responsibility for fellow Americans.

Trump attacked Cruz in a series of childish tweets that alternate between defensive and aggressive:

That’s the mayor wading through a flood of sewage in her own city with a bullhorn looking for people in need.

Are we tired of winning yet?

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Newspaper Accidentally Uses Photo Of Alec Baldwin Instead Of Donald Trump

It's fair to say that Alec Baldwin's impression of Donald Trump is one of the best things to happen to Saturday Night Live in a while. And it turns out that he’s so convincing, a newspaper in the Dominican Republic accidentally used a photo of the actor instead of the president in an article discussing Trump’s stance on Israeli settlements.

According to the Huffington PostEl Nacional issued a correction online after the screw up on Friday, but by then, the image was already circulating online. And Twitter users are loving it.

The paper stated the photo was sent to them by the Associated Press, correctly revealing that it was Alec Baldwin doing an impression of the president, but somehow, it accidentally made it into the paper. 

I guess his impression is just that good.

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Toddler Uses Amazon Alexa To Play 'Digger Digger' And Gets Very NSFW Response

Amazon Alexa is one of the gadgets that everyone has to own this Christmas. Basically, it’s an AI that you can ask to do pretty much anything. From ordering items off the internet, turn the lights off and on, and in the case of one family, playing music.

Reddit user zevets got his own Alexa for Christmas, and the kids are obsessed with it. His toddler likes to yell at it to play “Digger Digger” which I assume is a song the kids are listening to these days. That was until it returned a very inappropriate response. There’s some NSFW language in the video, so you have been warned. 

STOP ALEXA! STOP! 

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Recommended article: The Guardian’s Summary of Julian Assange’s Interview Went Viral and Was Completely False.

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Starbucks Barista Reveals The Shameless 'Hack' A Guy Uses To Get A Free Drink Everyday

A good loophole will make you cringe a little bit. But only a little, because you have to kind of admire someone’s cunning to exploit the loophole, but simultaneously feel embarrassed for them stooping so low.

I’m talking about people who bring tupperware into all-you-can eat buffets, or walk into a frozen yogurt spot and ask for samples of every flavor without buying anything, or the dreaded department store shopper who abuses the retailer’s very forgiving refund policy by returning a 9-year-old gown.

This guy takes his cleverness to the next level: by getting a free Starbucks coffee for every day of the year.

Brad Halsey, a Starbucks barista told Kitchenette about the shameless customer’s scam that nabs him daily free beverages.

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There is a man who comes to my Starbucks every single day and orders the most horrible drink in an infuriating way. He purchased 365 Starbucks cards and registered every one of them online with a different birthday so that he gets a “free birthday drink” EVERY DAY OF THE YEAR. Even though I know exactly how he “beat the system” there, he pretends that his app is just malfunctioning and it magically gives him the same free birthday drink every day.

That’s right, the dude bought hundreds of Starbucks gift cards and registered each of them with a different birthday so he could get a free “birthday” drink every single day.

Halsey says he doesn’t have a problem with the guy’s little scheme, it’s just that he’s apparently such a condescending, particular jerkwad about it.

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If he was a nice guy, I might not be so irritated. But he’s not a nice guy. Here is a sample of our exchange when he orders (when you imagine his voice, it should be pompous and creepy):

Me, scowling on the inside: “Hello.”

Him: “I need a Venti cup and a marker.”

Me: “Oooooohkaaaay. Here ya go.”

You thought that would be the end of their exchange? Halsey says that it gets worse.

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I reluctantly give him the cup and marker. He draws lines and arrows and writes all over the cup while telling me: “Two pumps of white mocha here, then add five pumps of vanilla. That should take us to this line here where you’re gonna add cold heavy cream up to this ridge here…it should be halfway between this line and this line. Make sure to add the heavy whipping cream before the espresso, it changes the taste if you do it out of order. Then add your four shots, three regular and one long shot. That long shot is important, since you guys reformulated your machines, it’s been Hell trying to get my drink right. That long shot helps balance it. Then stir it for me, Mister Brad. Now do me a favor and add ice to the top there and it’ll be easy as pie. I’m not picky so don’t worry about shaking it or anything like that.”

Me: “OK. Easy as pie.”

Him: “Now they ring it up for me like this: one quad espresso, add white mocha, sub vanilla, sub heavy cream.”

[He wants it rung up that way so he just has to pay $ 3.00 for a drink that really should be around $ 6.50 if it was rung up correctly as an Iced Quad Venti Vanilla White Mocha with heavy cream instead of milk.]

Me: “Gotcha.”

Not only does he get his free drink, but Halsey said the guy is more demanding than paying customers.

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Him: “Now I’m going to use my free birthday reward to pay. Did I tell you about my birthday reward app malfunction? The app is screwed up and it’s been giving me the same free birthday drink for twelve days now! I mean, I’m not going to complain or anything. Maybe I should check my mail at my old house and see if I’ve won free Starbucks for life! Ha ha ha!”

[he tastes his drink & frowns]

Him: “Mister Brad, why don’t you pour a decaf shot on top of this for me? It’ll be perfect then. It’s just a hair too sweet.”

[I pour one decaf shot on top of his drink]

Me, and my skin is crawling at this point: “Thanks! Have a great day. Oh yeah, and HAPPY BIRTHDAY.”

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